Verified by 
I don’t know about you, but I constantly feel I am failing to achieve a balance between my output at work versus my output at home. Bringing this to the forefront will also prompt you to look closely at your values.
In one sense, my values are founded in everything that involves family, such as emotional connection and nurturing. Yet, similarly, my values have everything to do with a hard work ethic, honesty, loyalty, and the feeling of giving or contributing.
Whenever I do one, I feel guilty about not doing another. And sometimes I need to do more of one and neglect the other. At the moment I write this, my elderly mother has fallen and my sisters and I need to take care of her. Rewind years ago, and my kids needed a lot more of me. Fast forward this movie of my life and my kids will need me again to take care of their kids. And during this, I will neglect my work.
Then there are the times I feel I must delve into my work due to the need to show up—showing up for my clients and showing up as a contributing member to our dual income household, and more. And to be completely honest, being an entrepreneur is a lot of work. As the joke goes, “We entrepreneurs left a 9-to-5 job so we could work a 5-to-11 job, seven days a week.” Entrepreneurial work has normalized social isolation and family neglect in so many ways.
As a way of shedding the shame for myself and providing shame therapy to my clients, I tell them that there is no such thing as work-life balance. I instead see these two entities being on a continuum or pendulum, swinging back and forth as necessary. Sometimes work needs more of you and sometimes family needs more of you. You swing with the need. You cannot be stubborn and ignore the other.
I ask my clients to eliminate the term balance altogether and instead replace it with harmony.
Work-Life Harmony
What does this look like? It means to include your partner regarding thoughts of guilt or sadness when you can’t be a part of the daily activities. It means sharing your thoughts of uncertainty about work. It means sharing your emotions about enjoying your work and why. This is about becoming more vulnerable with your partner. This can never be a bad thing. You must realize however that this is different from complaining. No one wants to be around a complainer, pessimist, or skeptic. If your partner is not privy to your heartfelt sharing, take it to a therapist or coach. Not every partner has the emotional capacity or intelligence to hear what you need to share. But always remember, sharing means caring.
Communication and vulnerability are, and always will be, the key to lasting relationships.
